A certain sense of repose, making things up, and being saved by the beauty of the world
This month in Hit Pause, Then Play, I talk about travelling to a distant location to sit in silence, talks with strangers and this world's lessons.
🤔 3 things I’m thinking
1. A certain sense of repose (Pause)
I’m writing to you from Los Angeles at the moment. I’ve come here to do what I do every few months. I come here to solve big problems.
One of the ways I solve big problems is to spend extended time in complete silence.
This is my second time in a place nestled in the mountains behind LA, where bears are known to wander up to the cottage and coyotes and birdsong are common. Half an hour away, further up in the mountains, Leonard Cohen, the great singer and poet, lived as an ordained monk at a small Zen Buddhist monastery in Mt Baldy.
There is complete peace here, yes, in the LA area. Hard to imagine, I know. But I have found a pocket of peace here. And silence.
Seeking complete silence is something I can and do often in the south of France where I live, but while I am in the business of living, I am not solving big problems, so to speak. I am in the business of living.
Here, on the other hand, after a day’s activity, the world winds down to a slow, if barely perceptible, spin. I am alone in the quiet of the mountains, so quiet that if I listen closely, I can hear myself breathe, my heart beat.
When I was younger, I would solve big problems by actively thinking about them. I created pro and con lists (isn’t that what we were taught to do? Turns out creating pro and con lists is not actually the best way to make a decision or solve a problem). I would talk to people, ask them what they thought, and turn their ideas over and over in my head. Surely, they must know how I could solve a problem - even better than I could.
Turns out all these years later that actually, no. Other people, with their experience and vision, beliefs and advice are just that: other people with other people problems.
Having aged and grown a bit more into this life of mine, I’ve come to experience the power of embracing silence and the art of stillness as the very best way to solve big problems.
Resting in silence and in stillness creates freedom for me.
It takes a while, but my attachment to answers begins to fall away.
Then something else happens. My attachment to problems falls away, too.
Thirty minutes down the road from Mt Baldy, I go for walks early in the morning and sit quietly at day’s end. I do not seek answers, I do not use spreadsheets, I do not call friends. I cook a simple meal. I sit in silence.
When you stop thinking about yourself all the time, a certain sense of repose overtakes you. - Pico Iyer
And as Leonard Cohen said to Pico Iyer when they met at the Mt Baldy Zen Center in the late 1990s,
… just sitting still, being unplugged, looking after [my] friends was… the real deep entertainment that the world had to offer.
It may have taken me a while, but I am coming to learn, again and again, that entering into deep stillness is the very source of my beginning.
To learn more about the quiet of these mountains behind LA and what unplugging can and does do, watch Pico Iyer, author of The Art of Stillness and many other books, speak about meeting Leonard Cohen in this 5-minute clip:
2. Four talks with strangers (Purpose)
On my recent Paris to Los Angeles journey, I engaged with four remarkable individuals, each sharing unique life stories.
First, a former league soccer player who transitioned from sports to launching a successful ride-sharing business in France. His years in the U.S. shaped his entrepreneurial spirit, leading to a thriving career and a non-profit supporting education in Cote d’Ivoire, his homeland.
Next, Chris, a recent UC Berkeley graduate working in Boston, discovered the ease of transatlantic travel. Born in China, raised in New Zealand, and now a globe-trotter, Chris contemplates a future return to New Zealand, embracing life's adventures.
Then, Jeremy, an American business traveler on a whirlwind trip to Dubai, shared his passion for extreme sports and travel. His experiences, from Queenstown adventures to upcoming safari plans in South Africa, reflected a life of diverse experiences.
Lastly, Claudia, an LA native and DirecTV project manager, recounted her solo travels to Morocco and beyond. She cherishes her freedom and the vivid beauty of her travels but values her lifestyle in the United States.
In a single day, I learned about the rich and varied lives of four strangers, who had I not been curious about, would never have shared their stories or taught me their life lessons:
Hamed taught me that Life is opportunity.
Chris taught me that Life is an adventure.
Jeremy taught me that Life can be lived differently.
Claudia taught me that Life is what you make of it.
3. Writing as witnessing (Passion)
It occurs to me that as writers, we do more than observe and make note of the world around us. By drafting word after word, we document both the extraordinary and the everyday in our little corners. We bear witness through our writing to fleeting moments, capturing once-in-a-lifetime - and not so-once-in-a-lifetime - events and preserving snippets that would otherwise be lost. Our typed tremors crystallise epiphanies, heartbreaks and quiet joys.
In chronicling life’s ebb and flow, we leave traces to be discovered, stories waiting to comfort or spur. Our written missives become time capsules, housing the spirit of eras for generations hence. What a gift, and what responsibility - to witness and faithfully record our truth as we perceive it. Our digital imprint has power - the power to transport readers to unseen worlds, the power to stir hearts, the power to preserve what might otherwise dim over time.
So as writers pecking at keyboards, we must open our eyes wide to the beauty and pain around us. And we must have the courage to tell the tales that need telling, the ones that resonate within us. For by writing, we can change both the world within and beyond us, reverberating in some small way within the greater human narrative.
📚 2 things I’m reading and listening to
1. 📖 Your Brain on Art, by Susan Magsamen and Ivy Ross (Passion)
This was my newest read this last month, and I was enchanted, encouraged and inspired to get back into jazz singing, going to the theatre and to live concerts. I was reminded that regularly exposing my children to music and art had been a priceless gift that would stick with them throughout their lives. I learned that consuming and creating art adds years to our lives, stimulates brain growth, repairs brain injuries, helps those with depression and cognitive decline and connects us socially. One of my favourite quotes (and there are many!) from the book was:
We evolved to be able to transform our complex emotional states and thoughts into communicable art forms that helped bridge the distance between individual self and others. As Lisa Feldman Barrett, a neuroscientist and psychologist at Northwestern University, so succinctly puts it: “Humans are the only animals on this planet who can simply make things up, agree on them as a group, and they become real.”
2. 🎧 Mary Oliver — “I got saved by the beauty of the world.” On Being with Krista Tippett (Pause, Passion, Purpose)
The late poet Mary Oliver is among the most beloved writers of modern times. Amidst the harshness of life, she found redemption in the natural world and in beautiful, precise language. She won the Pulitzer Prize and the National Book Award among her many honors — and published numerous collections of poetry and also some wonderful prose. Krista met with her in 2015 for this rare, intimate conversation. It is true nourishment.
🔥1 spark for you
What are you learning from the world?
Anything else?
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